I have a confession to make: I’ve always been oddly, unhealthily obsessed with the notion of strangers.
You know the ones, sitting idly opposite you on the subway to work, reading that book you bought but never got around to. Perhaps it was that well-put-together looking devil who shot you a dimpled grin in line on your lunch break, or the cute barista whose eyes lingered on yours for just a moment too long as he handed back your change, just long enough to telepathically shout “Hey, you! We’d get along real great!”
We’ve all met them, the infamously elusive and under-studied Stranger Soulmate.
In the brief amount of time it takes to reach your train station, hit the front of the lunch line, or collect your latte, you’ve somehow managed to project an intricate life together with this person, and, as you obviously know nothing about them, you kindly, thoughtfully, take the initiative of filling in the blanks. You’ve always been good like that.
His parents probably live on a small property in the country, he’s probably an artist whose love for foreign cinema is matched only by his passion for classic literature and unusual penchant for Sylvia Plath quotes. He probably has two younger brothers, instilling in him a rare and endearing maternal disposition; and, whats more, he’s probably looking to settle down with someone- someone just like you (insert game-show cheering!)
Sure, in reality you know nothing about him other than the fact he’s got a crooked gap between his teeth, a freckle on his middle finger, an adventurer’s tan and kind eyes – but it doesn’t matter. In that fleeting moment, he’s everything you didn’t know you’d always wanted. Surely enough, though, as quickly as he arrives, the cruel tide of everyday life takes over and he’s gone—the idea of him is sucked back to a sea of lost potential and unfulfilled promise.
This is when most emotionally stable humans let out a simple, defeated sigh, shrug and return to their lives as mature, responsible adults. I am not one of these people. While others might surrender happily to the natural currents of life, my love is a boat that swings and turns bow first into the fickle breeze of romance.
I hold on—oh boy, do I hold on. I hold on like a starving man might hold on to a bagel, like a returning soldier might hold on to his newborn son. Like building a sandcastle with loose, dry sand, I push for a connection with these oblivious bystanders. I refuse to let go, to realize their inherent roles as passers-by. I stare nervously, I scribble my number onto crinkled napkins, I concoct intricate plans to “accidentally” bump into them on the street where I’ll gasp “Oh, sorry, let me grab that for you,” and they’ll reply, “Sure, but only if you let me buy you a drink”.
So far these futile attempts at inducing love have failed to eventuate into anything more than a pitiful nod, which leaves me wondering: why do I do it?
Most people underestimate the significance of a moment. The paradox of a moment is that an instant in time can be more significant than the sum of all moments up until then. Perhaps this is the root of my obsession: a romanticism for the speed at which life can change and the desire for it to do so.
You see, I quite honestly believe that every stranger we pass on the street is a connection lost. Every stranger holds the potential to divert our direction, be it for a day or a lifetime. Call it the butterfly effect, sliding doors, whatever—it’s an idea that I find both incredibly liberating and terrifying at the same time.
This casual determinism is my way of rebelling against the fatalistic views of love instilled in us from birth. Does popular culture not force-feed us the belief that love is a divine destination predetermined for a mere lucky few? Am I so terrified by the prospect of missing out that I’ve grown obsessed with forcing fate’s hand?
I suppose you could argue that these glorified strangers—the ones we fall for in fleeting silence—they’re the necessary catalyst for the unattainable notion of some cinematic, utopian idea of happiness, a counterweight to the often depressive nature of being an over-thinking, 20-something romantic. It’s as soothing as it is frustrating. It is the ability to consciously shift our scorned affections onto the mere projection of a person: someone who can’t let you down, someone who can’t hurt you.
It’s only when these encounters leave you feeling empty—as though, in all your giddiness, you stupidly missed destiny’s cue—that one must grow weary of their romantic disposition and accept that maybe, just maybe, fate need not have its hand forced after all.
Happy valentine’s day everyone
There are lots of people who asked how i cut my hair recently, how i style my hair, what kind of product do i use. And i think it’s pretty cool that people find my hair is somekind of, i don’t know, good? I know the way i styled my hair is far from great yet i am still learning to achieve the best that can represent the real me.
Contrary to popular belief, hairstyle is holding an important role on representing yourself, other than your outfits. As for me, no matter how branded your clothes is or how shiny your shoes, the first thing people noticed about you is your head, especially your face and haircut. That’s why finding a good hairstylist is as hard as finding your soulmate. Your hairstylist must know what you want, gives a little advice, if you agree to disagree then they must follow the instruction. I had been meeting with a lot of hairstylist that was a real pain in the ass, and having like whole month of bad hair days, it was a long journey.
Regarding products, it’s always good to use a product that’s recommended by your hairstylist, especially if you are satisfied with the result, but you can always experimenting with something new, there’s no harm in trying. But here’s the thing, good product = good result, you can’t expect a $5 can would do any good to your hair, in fact Gatsby Moving Rubber series contains a fair amount of Ethylhexyl palmitate, an ingredient known as the cause of acne breakouts. If you have a very sensitive skin you should stay out of it. You can find the rest of the list here
I am a lover of short hair, i always find short haired ladies are cool, especially if she goes pixie and still look extremely feminine, two thumbs up. For menshair, i am so captivated by Jordan O’brien messy pomp combined with adorable facial hair (JORDAANN I AM YOUR FANGURL AAAWW), and no, i don’t like guys with korean or japanese mid length hair because they looked too feminine, and because my hair is accidentally looked like typical korean hair. I can’t help it ya know because i am ASIAN. But calm down guys, no worries, i am gonna dye my hair back again next month.
So guys, if you wanna find a good hairstyle for yourself, keep experimenting. Because every people was born unique, some people has soft hair, or high hair line, oval face or big nose, whatever. You don’t have to stick on those. If you find the hairstyle would look good on you, talk to your hairstylist and try it! If the hairstyle goes wrong, change it again next month! If you have more than one favorite hairstyles, you should cut from the longest style because if anything goes wrong you don’t have to wait for another months to grow up your hair and change it. So keep experimenting
Anonymous asked: Kak Elvira, halo kak. Kok bisa ngefans sama Saechan sih? Kan banyak yang lebih imut, Kawei contohnya hehehe. Nuhuun
I am into idols that can relate to me somehow, bukan karna orangnya cantik atau kawai, sugoi, atau apalah namanya. Soalnya saya sama Saechan sama2 agak kelebihan roh cowoknya dikit, sama2 terobsesi dengan Tomica (as for me Hot Wheels), etc. Itu aja sih..
Jadi idols yang kayak Yukirin, Kojiharu atau Tomochin sama sekali ga ‘nyentil’ buat saya hehehe..
Anonymous asked: elvira-neechan, what kind of product would you recommend for short-medium hair (i'm a guy), natural asian dark hair? I am a n00b so can you recommend things that easy to apply and doesn't take too much time? Thanks
do you really think i am older than you? how rude lol
Let’s start from your budget? are you lookin for hair product that slightly cheap or can you spend more bucks on it? If you live in southeast asia and looking for fairly cheap hair product, you can invest in Gatsby Moving Rubber Series or Schwarzkopf. It’s not really cheap, it’s about $8-$10 but better than Brisk or L’oreal. Since your hair is asian dark which presumably shiny enough, i would recommend something matte, Grudge Matt or Got2b Beach Matt would be alright. If you have extra bucks and extra time i would like you to try Hanz de Fuko series, since it’s not available in asia you have to order it online from the store in USA. It doesn’t weight down your hair like Gatsby series (that heavy feelin your head got after applying the product), yet easy to wash unlike, again, Gatsby Series. You can google it yourself.
Do you like to style your hair stand up against gravity or you just want to defining your texture? if the first one is your answer you can try any got2b’s products that has word “glue” on it, it works exactly like glue. If you have extra bucks, you can try LIPPS Hard Wax, it’s very unique, the texture is so creamy when you apply it on your hands but once it get on your hair IT HOLDS LIKE CHARM. But hard to get since it’s a exclusive product from japanese salon and they dont ship it worldwide, unless you get someone to buy it for you
For defining the texture, both Grudge Matt, Got2b Beach matt, Hanz de Fuko, works great. But this is my personal favorite, i am using it for almost a year, it doesn’t weight down your hair, holds perfectly, smells good, and no sticky… Tadaaaa JOICO MOLDING CLAY, it’s just a click away (i bought it online), a bit pricey about $25 but WORTH THE MONEY.
There are other products i would recommend so far :
Nakano Styling Wax, Arimino Spice (you can find it at Shunji Matsuo Salon but it’s a lot pricey about $32, Ebay is your bestfriend), Schwarzkopf Osis+ Clay
Hope it helps
Saechan’s Blazer appreciation post.
Because my oshimen is hot in any outfits
You know how people buy drinks for girls in bars? Why can’t people do that in book stores? Like if I’m looking at a novel in Barnes and Noble and some person walks up to me and strikes up a conversation and offers to buy the book for me there is a lot better chance of that working out in their favor
I’m going to reblog this until it’s a cultural norm.
Lets do it
plus less chance of drugs being slipped into your book
Just took sexuality test and turns out i am a pansexual.
I mean, who doesn’t love pan, everyone loves pan, you cant make certain dishes without pan, of course i love pan
Studies have shown that, indeed, introverts are more likely than extroverts to express intimate facts about themselves online that their family and friends would be surprised to read, to say that they can express the “real me” online, and to spend more time in certain kinds of online discussions. They welcome the chance to communicate digitally. The same person who would never raise his hand in a lecture hall of two hundred people might blog to two thousand, or two million, without thinking twice. The same person who finds it difficult to introduce himself to strangers might establish a presence online and then extend these relationships into the real world.Susan Cain, Quiet: the Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking (via typesetjez)
EGAO || BACK NUMBER
Kyou, Koi Wo Hajimemasu (movie)
Anonymous asked: Favorite japanese dorama you ever watched?
I wouldn’t set them into rank because i love em all equally.. Here we go
- Friends (2002)
- Detective Conan Live Action (2011)
- Mielino Kashiwagi (2013)
- Akai Ito (2008)
- Itazura na Kissu (2013)